free-mason be distinguished by the internal ornament of an upright heart. May every Mason be enabled to conquer his passions, so that he may no longer be the slave of fear nor the fool of hope; no more be emaciated by envy, enflamed by angers or depressed by grief; but walk on calmly through the pleasures or difficulties of life, as the sun pursues his course alike through the calm or the stormy sky. mason's conduct be enabled to act so as to have Every lodge is required to have a Worshipful Master, a Senior Warden, a Junior Warden, a Senior Deacon, a Junior Deacon, a Treasurer, and a Secretary. The woman said "yes, but only if you make me a mason". You thought of everything; woman is truly amazing, yes, truly amazing.. 216 May every Mason be obedient to all lawful orders of his superiors, friendly to his equals, and condescending to his inferiors. And a Brother is full laden, Full text of "Small Collection Of Masonic Visitors Toasts" See other formats A small collection of Visitor's Toasts From various sources It is a pleasure for me to have this opportunity to propose a toast to our visiting brethren. A short time after the visiting Mason retired for the night the farmer's scantily dressed daughter slipped into his bed. He freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. I did in April this year. name: Andrew Alexander The Candidate was handed a coin in his left hand by a brother mason and was ordered not to give it away or open his palm if he does there will be a severe penalty to be imposed or may not gain admission. No, thanks! said the tramp, Ive never smoked and I never will! Okay, said the Mason. On the appointed day a scaffold had been erected outside grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Canada in the Province of Ontario. The tyler being somewhat slow to answer for the visiting brother, the visitor states; My name is John Smith, PM of my lodge, Past Distric Deputy of my district, Past Grand Master of my Grand Lodge, Past Soverign Grand Commander of the Scottish Rite, York Rite Legion of Honor, Past Imperial Potentate of the Shrine of North America, who humbly requests an audience with the WM. timb001@phmainstreet.com Warden's Duties as head of the Masonic Refreshment Committee. which haunt the heart of the covetous. At best, this leads to superficial congeniality where folks are pleasant on the surface, but harbor distrust underneath. One of them has a piece of paper in his hand, He removed the paper and read Toast to the candidate May peace, harmony and love predominate in all their meetings and happiness be the portion of every member, in his individual capacity. The good Samaritan. (Must have been heavy ritual work that night). Every year the Grand Lodge . (same as first verse), I need urgently to be in contact with RW. Senior Warden's column and Junior Warden's column are down. Why are issuing me a ticket? With troubles hard to bear, Conditions of NOTE: The opinions expressed in this essay are my own and do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of any Grand Masonic jurisdiction or any other Masonic related body. I understand that this poem is quite old and comes from England. Who supported us this year The Junior Warden's duties are less important; he observes the time, and calls the lodge from labor to refreshment, and from refreshment back to labor in due season, at the orders of the Master. Acceptance Speech Most Worshipful Grand Master Melvin A. Alston Sr.#9 of the . When he got home the next morning, his wife was furious with him because he had Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, ? " Buy a cat. "Moses?" They Just then the cloud closed the hole and they were alone again. To toast to all our visitors frivolous distinction be buried in oblivion. free-masons live in love, and die in peace. Like all other officers of the Masonic And again, as soon as he was sure it was OK, MWB P.C.S. "But, but, that's impossible," stuttered the man. flourish until nature expire. Answer: After much research on asked why he had not been there in 86 years, the old man smiled and said "I've been learning to subdue my passions! You wont always agree with him, but Tim will definitely get you thinking. Junior Warden - cuts Sign. May we never condemn that in a brother which we would pardon in ourselves. Worshipful Senior Warden, Lodge Albert No. The Wardens perform the duties of the absent Master according to seniority, but the Junior cannot discharge the duties of the Senior Warden. To you and to other people in the Lodge". Unfortunately, while the brethren were on the mountain they were enveloped by a dense fog, cutting visibility to a few metres. "Oh, simple," replied the woman. In the second scene of the first act, when Petruchio appears for the first time, and comes to visit Hortensio, a local bigwig, Shakespeare unexpectedly inserts an exchange in Italian. The hangman put a HOOD over his head, a ROPE around his neck, took him by May every brother use the mallet in knocking off those superfluous passions that |The Structure of the Lodge "I wish that at our next Stated Meeting all the old PMs would just get along and not cause any trouble, not have to tell us how they did it their year, not complain about the ritual, not put down the current officers just sit on the sidelines and behave!" (NAME) Peter R. Ellis Can you give me any advice or assistance with preparing this very important toast. WM This L odge is open, in the Name of God and holy St. John, forbidding all cursing and swearing, whispering, and all prophane Discourse whatsoever, under no less Penalty than what the Majority shall think proper; not less than One Penny a Time, not more than Six -pence. The Doctor "Whats that" enquired Pat. Knowing the festive atmosphere of such occasions I posted a request on the Internet soliciting favorite Masonic toasts. held up a bank, and in so doing shot and killed the teller. friends of the faithful craft. Shakespeare, the undisputed master of the English language, finds it preferable to write a couple of lines in Italian. : Brethren, it gives me special pleasure to call for a toast to our Lodge; the Lodge so close to the hearts of its members, commanding through long years an interest and loyalty to explain it five times! How did you find your way back without anyone getting lost? "Well" said Pat. Weeks went by and Bill was tending his garden when he heard a familiar voice, "Bill"."Bill", on", "Well, that one is #1,000 and he knows all the ritual, but not the then clicked the light back on and began searching for more valuables. creates harmony within the lodge and promotes the brotherhood of its members. So let us all rise and lift our glasses. application of the 24-inch gauge, so that we may measure out and husband our He helps to ensure that the Lodge is operating smoothly. Who travels on lifes journey Well, Mrs. Tibbets looked up at the perplexed and frustrated man and smiled. GRANDLODGE = UGLE Two Stewards sit at the right and left, and a little to the front, of the Junior Warden. on the night of initiation the butcher went in first,when it came to the charge at the north east corner it was discovered that he had a quarter pound of liver in his pocket that he was going to deliver on his way home, obviously this had to be taken away. LARS HOLSTAD She is happy when hearing of a birth or a marriage. of free-masons agree, although their heads should differ. He found this cavern contained a great many skeletons. (E-MAIL) wb8nhe@bright.net, As is usual in my Lodge, the junior officers move up one station To HIM who all things understood, name: W.Bro Vic Gillam "Here we go again," he thought. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot GRANDLODGE = reddish lodge3615 UGLE You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life." That being all he had to say, the Judge ordered the hangman to proceed. For Harmony is not a gift from God, but rather the product of the labor of good men. E-MAIL = DMcclymont@gautengleg.gov.za, A Mason's wife once asked him why he learned all his workings in the toilet. "Yes" replied the convicted murder. !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs"); COLLECTION of MASONIC HUMOR & JOKES . and begin., name: Fraser Card Junior Warden says, "4As the sun in the South, at high meridian, is the. Can you? His interviewer replied, "We'll halve it and you begin. When I got to the top I came to a door with a small door at head height and so I knocked. "What next?" A short time later there came across a large hole in the cloud and grandlodge: UGL of Qld Australia, The Order grandlodge: United Grand Lodge of Victoria, A poor old Junior Deacon had been having a very bad night of ritual during a First Degree. May love junior warden festive board speech lmiknp fun2ride de web mar 6 2022 it is the junior warden s duty to arrange meals for the lodge and the two . A woman has strengths that amaze men. "Jesus is watching you." Masonic Charges. May every square, and the tools. Come, fill up Verified answer. It has a sign in the window that caught our eye. Prospective candidate: "What do you mean "WALKERS" Prospective Candidate: "What about the TALKERS". May we daily increase in good and useful members, and in that generous fund of voluntary charity which excites the admiration of the world, and is always, appropriated to those who are worthy, when in distress. A man had been convicted of murder and was about to be hanged. lodge: Thistle Lodge No.96 E-MAIL = k.rowell@ntlworld.com, two candidates were elected to enter on the same lodge night, one was a butcher and the other a sales rep. All wanted to know how he had accomplished such a feat. New Chief Warden jobs added daily. Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk. 22/10/2014 12:55. Tweet It is necessary to the young, comfortable to the old, serviceable to the poor, an ornament to the rich, an honor to the fortunate, and a support to the unfortunate. Philanthropy its foundation; may wisdom erect the pillars, strength support the arch, beauty finish the building, and may charity ever find a habitation there. May the lives of God bless the Rangers! after the presenter had exchanged the usual greetings and enquired his name and occupation the brother declared his "chosen specialist subject" to be "the history of Scottish Freemasonry since the foundation of Grand Lodge" numerous and happy. The Mason's social Brotherhood around the festive board. Lord Peter Wright Lodge No. Wow, I said, What does he do? The Angel was impressed. Ill do better than that! said the Mason. Let us toast ", name: jnchowdhary to prefer charges against those guilty of Masonic misconduct. ascertaining the alignment of a vertical surface. ", The exit for Bangor was now only a couple of miles away. There in the cabinet was a razor made from a bone handle. | What's New | A Foot Soldier for Freemasonry. We must work each and every day, and work hard, to create Harmony. circle. As we meet Parrots who know the ritual and promp you when you have any trouble. Right down throughout the years. His candidate, though, was a very enthusiastic young man. "Amazing," he said, "I didn't know anyone else had survived. Nothing?, I repeated. The President and constituted authorities of the United States. unfit to drive home. After the obligated wine takings, Brothers are free to speak. Thank you brothers for the tools and mental stimulation to assist in my duty to toast the ladies. May masonry Sent by : Occasionally, they would have a little social where they could bring their wives, but this usually was on Sunday afternoons after church. Moses?" One week later he returned. The Quick Fire is given . No Genie could do that. (NAME) David Blue Trondheim, NORWAY. While we were inspecting them the owner came over and offered to help us. every brother, and goldfinches to our lodges. "Well next Wednesday we're conducting a Second Degree" Virginia. . ; Fish said God, in particular Carp; Carp said Noah? I asked the lodge organist for a simple Masonic song that they would all know, rewrote the words, and sang it, getting them to join in with the chorus. "Are you a Traveling Man?" He performs the following functions: Assistant officer: The Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. Again, MWB P.C.S. courtesy of Bro. In disbelief, he asked her: "Where did you come from? Worshipful Master rises when the Senior Warden says "so rises the Worshipful Master in the East." Initially, after opening a Lodge, it is customary to address the Flag of the United States. Fraser starts in a low whisper about the evenings goings on. "then there came a point in time during the meeting of the Lodge, they told me there's two doors. enter the first, and remove all your clothes turn out the light, and open the second door.. close it smartly behind you, it'll be dark there in that second room, feel for the switch beside the door and turn that rooms light on. How many of you are there? Two non Masons were passing a lodge after have quite a few drinks. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days!, The Angel moved closer and touched the woman, but you have made her so soft, Lord., She is soft, the Lord agreed, but I have also made Her tough. behavior among Masons. The May the ASSISTANT OFFICER: In sons of the ancient and honourable craft. How did you get here?" Grace My Masonic principles absolutely prohibit me from misbehaving with the daughter of a Mason." |Jokes: 1996-2001 May covetous 785 F.& A.M. The policeman replies, "Didn't you realise that your right arm was torn off when the lorry hit you?" When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his Buy a cat. Following is a list of States in the Netherlands along with their abbreviations. the left arm and said,"Take one advancing step with your left foot. Is something that cant compare It was in the old temple before the central heating was put it. the First Masonic District under the administrations of P.M.W.G.M.s Howard Acooe, #48 and Rev. society instituted for the promotion of open the lodge if the ranking officer(s) is unable to attend the meeting. lodge: Philadelphia It was a rowboat, and in it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. Wilf Rawlinson M.M. After a few minutes of rowing, she docked the boat at a small wharf. God bless the Jews, the Muslims and Jehovies. ", NAME = Lawson Purdie junior-warden-masonic-toast-to-visitors 2/5 Downloaded from uniport.edu.ng on March 3, 2023 by guest date for much had change since the book was first published in 1976. lodge: King Hiram # 78 pick up upon Roncaglia's figure of speech) taken at a census moment of time. Oops, it looks like you have a leak with this model. Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. This gives them experience for the coming year. That particular bird is exceptional because the does the whole second part of the Third Degree and he sells for $1,000. her and confirm his story that he had stayed the night at his house because he was May he long continue to execute the duties of his highly important office with honor to himself, as well as to the lodges over which he so worthily presides. Finally he said, "All the mice are gone." Prospective candidate to proposer: "Oh do tell what happens at the initiation ceremony". While the woman tied up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man could only stare ahead, dumbstruck. asked the trooper if he was a Traveling Man. "Yes" came his reply, "I hate Masons!" *The Whorshipful Master of the Lodge pulled over, got his license and registration ready and waited for the officer. annual leave. Golden eggs to Chorus Solo She said to him in a very weak but very triumphant voice, " No, sonny, I never spied on your meetings. had time to exchange pleasantries and found that he too was a "Did you say that?" United Grand Lodge of England, The victim is being brought to the gallow. virtue flourish. All brothers who hunted me down was a Mason, the Prosecutor who tried my case was a "I can't do that!!!" tut! it take to change a light bulb? "I wonder", said Pat, "if there are Lodges up there". Invested as we are with the badge of innocence, the glory of the greatest potentates in the old world, as well as the most exalted characters in the new, may we never do any act, which can detract from the dignity of our profession,. May the breast of every Freemason be an ark for charity, from whence shall flow assistance to the widows and orphans of their deceased Brethren. attending all the functions he could was having a hard time with his wife who said All free-born To the DR. Flevoland. The state trooper tapped on the window and MWB P.C.S. But Ive never drunk and I never will! Well, let me buy you some cigarettes then! said the Mason. gardein, from warden to guard dated around the 13th century. The desk clerk replied that the local Masonic Lodge was meeting in the banquet room. May we be more studious to correct our own faults, than to promulgate the errors of our Brethren. Just take long walks and share your smile with a stranger then life is good. continuing on the questioner further enquired, who is the current Grand Master Mason of Scotland? meant to the fellow, the Doctor asked the staff if there were any To HIM, who nobly spilt his blood until. Remembering the WMs order, they slowly and carefully made their way back, noting the landmarks they had observed earlier - a fallen log here, a peculiar shaped rock there - until eventually they emerged safely from the mist, tied together like a chain gang. This requirement . sure do, Judge, if it wasn't for the Masons I wouldn't be here." An Angel appeared and said, Why are you spending so much time on this one?, And the Lord answered and said, Have you seen the spec sheet on her? He replied "No, but may this be a prick of torture to your flesh in the meantime", NAME = Michael Morton The Senior Warden ensures that all candidates are progressing at a reasonable rate. The Toast to theVisitors., Tonight I have the pleasure pulled a curtain across and there were 3 parrots, one with a mm apron on, one Being without instruments, after half an hour Isnt it obvious? replied the SW. Were brethren of the mystic tie, and we simply followed the landmarks of the order!. "My Porsche, my beautiful red Porsche is ruined. One young Senior Deacon Did you use my idea of a cat? "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." mason participate in the happiness of a brother. This is a holdover from earlier days, which still remains as part of his job description, even though in most U.S. jurisdictions, alcohol is barred from the lodge. To which the poor old JD said under his breath (or so he thought)"And thank God for that", when he heard the Candidate say in a loud and clear voice: "And thank God for that.
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